Thursday, April 19, 2007

Brain Surgery, Day Seven

This will be my last post from Denver on Mother's Brain Bleed. One week later she is doing amazingly well. She was happy this morning because she had finally gotten her hair washed, and could begin to see the magnitude of her scar-starting on her forehead, above her left temple, then all the way around in a loop that ends behind her left ear. She is amazed, and rather proud of the head scar. She was less happy to discover that she has stitches beside, and below her left eye, but came 'round to a more philosophical point of view shortly. "At least I can see out of it, though it's still rather blurry."

She blows me away.

She will be going from the hospital to a rehab place where my sister-in-law's sister-in-law. Glenda, is an administrator. She will look after Mom well, I know. Mom is not happy about this, but is resigned to going. She knows that the schedule in rehab is a good deal more rigorous than her schedule would have been if she came right home. On the other hand, her depth perception and balance are off, not to mention her double vision, so she's also scared to come right home from the hospital. (Thank Goodness!)
 
Dad seems to be into denial about how close a call this was, and resentful that I can understand what the doctors are saying better than him (he's pretty deaf, too). It makes me sad that we don't know each other well enough to discuss what's going on, but I see that he, quite literally, does not have the understanding of how to discuss painful stuff, and has no interest in trying. It's too scary for him.
 
I recognize control issues on both sides-his and mine-and know that I have to let go tomorrow, and pack up and leave early Saturday. I know that he-and my brother Luke who lives nearby-will do fine without me, but letting go will be painful. I'll do it, of course, cheerfully and with great love to Mom, then go out to the car to cry.
 
I know that in my own way I am as strong as my mother, just more in touch with my feelings. And I know that my parents lean on each other, after 58 years of marriage, and am glad they have each other, no matter what their past may have held.
 
I won't write again until I get home and resettled, but must add once again how much I have appreciated your prayers and support during this painful time, and how much they have meant to my mother, as well.
 
Blessings, Margo

11 comments:

lisa41076 said...

Margo, you are an amazing woman, and I think you have alot of your mom in you, I admire you alot !!!!!! Hope you have a safe trip home and sending Hugs your way, still keeping your mom in my thoughts, Hugs and Prayers Lisa

ksquester said...

Oh Margo, YOU are an amazing daughter.  If my father wasn't dead, I would swear you and I had the same one.   One day we should IM each other.  Take care and have a safe trip.   Anne

amy122389 said...

All I've got that seems to not sound dumb is a bunch of hugs...  

think though....2 weeks ago, you didn't know you were this strong.  Now you KNOW you are.  ;-)  Have a safe trip home!!!

~Amy

dbaumgartner said...

Your Mom sounds like she's making amazing progress. So good to hear she will be going to rehab. That's so important.

You take care of you and we'll be here when you get back.

Hugs, my friend,

Deb

dklars said...

Have a safe trip home.  I'm happy your mother is doing so well so quickly.  I'll continue to keep you both in my prayers.
~~Kath~~

luvmort said...

The power of the human body to heal even after something so incredible will always amaze me.  
Have a safe trip home.

gazker said...

Margo, you are so strong, just like your Mum, I am so glad she has come through the worst of it.
Best wishes to you all, including your Dad.
Gaz xxx

tellsg said...

Thats great news that your mum is going to the rehab so quickly and its nice that she is going where a family member will be there to keep an eye.  I think you have done all you can do there and wish you a safe journey home.  Hugs, Terry x

hope5555 said...

Again, what an amazing thing that you just happened to be there to be of help. It sounds like your mother will be in good hands at rehab.  You are very insightful about your dad's coping style.

stetsonsfyre said...

Just checking in on you - I'm proud of you and your Mum sounds so awsome :)  You know when I light the candles I put the wishes for her and you in there...Wind to thy Wings Sister*  Teresa
http://journals.aol.com/stetsonsfyre/remembering-to-exhale/

hestiahomeschool said...

For some reason BLogger is saying that my password does not match my name (duh...it has been the same forever) and will also not let me post under anonymous, so I am leaving you notes here for now so you will know I am thinking of you...love, Kas