Friday, July 23, 2004

Dog Tired

When I was working at the Womens' Prison, Friday evenings were for keeling over,  coming home and spacing out in front of HGTV until bedtime. Nowadays, every day is a day off (of sorts) and yet I still manage to end the week exhausted. Go figure.

Today was a fairly restful day, though-no doctors appointments, no gym, no scheduled activities at all. One of the things people who don't live with chronic illnesses can't understand is how exhausting pain, and the accompaning anxiety, really are. One kind meaning (but rude) acquaintance suggested this exhaustion-and at least some of the pain- was mostly in my head, not my body. "WRONg," I said,not too calmly, and burst into tears. She was horrified, and beat a hasty retreat, murmmering to Rene that she didn't mean to upset me as she rushed out the door. That was months ago, and she hasn't been back.

With 20/20 hindsight, I recognize I was not so much rersponding to her as to all the doctors over the years who have pooh poohed my very real symptoms. Like the dizziness and fainting which was diagnosed as anxiety attacks and turned out to be diabetes, and the chest pain which was supposedly stress related turned out to be heart disease! These days at least I know when a symptom is real and am capable of persisting until someone figures out what's wrong-many years of therapy well spent!

Today was notable for all our unexpected company. Our friend Pam come over to put together my computer chair and new bookcase. Rene is handicapped and cannot get down on her knees, and I am still dealing with arm and hand problems, so Pam is a goddess-sent handy person who is blessed with good spatial relationship skills. She had those thing put together in two hours flat, and that included moving my bedroom furniture all around. As she finished up, Kate called. She was in the vacinity, could she stop by? The four of us had lunch together, then the three of them went off to Ocean State Job Lot to buy Stuff, while I napped. This evening Peggy dropped by to eat her on the run take out food supper, and now I am close to bedtime.

I often say how blessed we are with our friends, and, over the last year, have discovered how valuable they really are!

Sleep well, and wake up rested,


P.S. This is not our chihuahua, but eventually I'll get a picture of our Miya up.




bernmilo said...

aweee how cute.

judithheartsong said...

what a wonderful journal you have here! So glad to visit. judi